I'm Afraid Of The Light
by Castaway girl
Summary: Beca doesn't want to waste her time in college. Especially since her father is there. She just wants to move to LA and produce music. LA was something she planned for since the beginning of her senior year, but everything changed right before graduation. She became much darker and lonelier. She lost a friend or someone who she thought was a friend. He screwed everything up for her.
1. Beca's First Day

_**Hello There! Thanks for coming to check out my story. This is my first Pitch Perfect fan fiction and it has been a while since I've written anything…..so I apologize for any amateur errors! This story is a little bit different from the movie and other stories I have read so far. Reviews are always welcome….but not necessary. I won't be able to upload ALL the time…so sorry. Hope you enjoy! **___

_Summary: Beca doesn't want to waste her time in college. Especially since her father is there. She just wants to move to LA and produce music. LA was something she planned for since the beginning of her senior year, but everything changed right before graduation. She became much darker and lonelier. She lost a friend or someone who she thought was a friend. He screwed everything up for her. Throughout her journey through college she will learn that deep down inside of her she's not okay. Hopefully somebody (Maybe a cute a capella nerd) will bring light into her life._

**I'm Afraid Of The Light**

Beca Mitchell was never a normal girl, even when she was just an infant. She never wanted to play with barbies or play with her Mom's makeup. She just wanted to listen to music and bang on a pot in the kitchen.

By the time she was 10, her Dad had been caught cheating on her mom. They, of course got divorced and he left. From then on she figured out she would be at her best independently and not leaning on others to help her through all of her problems. And she was okay with this.

~ Present Day ~

Today was Beca's first day at Barden University. There were so many reasons why she didn't want to be in a taxi on her way to her first day at college, but there was that one reason why she had to do this. At least for now until she could figure something out.

As she arrived to the campus, she looked around and rolled her eyes. It looked like one of those stupid comedy movies about college parties and people getting drunk. She always hated movies. She could never make it to the end.

She snapped back into reality when the taxi driver opened her door for her letting her know they reached the correct destination and that she needed to unload her bags from the back of the car so he could go pick up any new clients he could find.

As she unloaded all of her bags onto the cart this annoying blonde girl in a green shirt jumped out of nowhere and started talking really fast. As the blonde was telling Beca the route to her dorm, she kept hearing a car stereo blasting an old classic rock song. She looked over as the noise became louder and louder and saw a guy in the backseat playing an air solo to 'Carry On My Wayward Son'. She couldn't really get a good look at his face, but she could see his toned arms. A lot of the guys around here will probably be pretty built.

When she arrived to her dorm, it was completely empty. Her roommate hadn't even arrived yet. She was kind of glad. She had time to herself. She could unpack everything and set up her side of the dorm room.

She was in the middle of unpacking the last few things when somebody knocked on the door. She expected it to be her roommate, but her father was on the other side of the door.

He just let himself in as she walked back to unpacking her things.

"I don't get a hello or anything?" she rolled her eyes at his 'question'.

"Why would I make conversation about being somewhere I really don't want to be? Especially with a person who I don't really want to see."

"Beca, I know this isn't ideal for you, but it's important for you to get a college education. And for free I might add."

Beca just kept quiet and unpacked her laptop and set it up on the desk so she could finish one of her mixes.

"So when did you get here? How did you get here?

"About an hour ago and I took a taxi." She replied with no emotion.

"Well I'm glad you're here. Shelley will be glad to know you're here too. We'll have to have you over for dinner soon."

"That makes one of us. How is the step-monster?" She asked amused at the phrase 'step-monster'.

"She's good. At a conference in New Yor-"

"Oh no. Dad I don't really care. I just wanted to say step-monster."

Her father soon gave up with trying to get anything positive from her and left. She then decided to go to the fair that she could see right outside of her window to go and see if there is anything here that won't be too lame for her to stick with for a while.

She didn't see anything that really interested her. These two girls tried to get her to sign up for this audition to sing. She tried to not laugh at their idea of fun. By the end of the fair she signed up for an intern job down at the cd store that also had the campus radio station.

When she returned to her dorm, her roommate finally hoed up. The girl she would share a dorm room with for the rest of the year seemed pretty nice. She was white and brunette. Seemed down to Earth and not very talkative.

She found herself over at her computer looking at pictures from high school. So much has changed since her Freshman year. She has become a completely different person now. All because of Scottie. The boy who had the nerve to walk right up to her on her first day while she was trying to figure out her locker combination and how to get to her classes. He made her genuinely smile for the first time since her parents' divorce. He was her rock when she needed to depend on someone. Even for just a little while. But everything changed. He wasn't the person she thought he was. He ruined her only plan for her future. She needed to clear her head before she could even think about LA and what she would be like if she were there right now.

It was a long day. She decided to just go to sleep. Just so her brain could turn off for a bit. She didn't need to be crying herself to sleep tonight. And with that, she put on her headphones and drifted off into a deep sleep.

**Okay then! Hopefully you liked it. Maybe a little confusing. Probably a few spelling and grammar errors. Sorry about that. Anyways maybe you'll let me know what you think? THANKS! – Castaway Girl 3 **

**PS. Jesse will be a huge part of this story. He'll make an official appearance soon. I mean Skylar Astin is my obsession right now and kind of the reason why Pitch Perfect is on replay right now ;)**


	2. Mystery

_**Hey! So I see I have quite a few followers for this story already! WELCOME! No reviews yet, but I think it's still too early for anyone to have anything to say…anyways. Here is chapter 2! **___

**I'm Afraid Of The Light – Ch.2**

Beca woke up to the sound of her alarm going off at 6 AM letting her know it was time for her to get up and get ready for her first day of classes.

"Good morning sleepyhead! Have a good first day, Beca." Her roommate, Casey said on her way out of their dorm.

By 7:30 she was at her first class. She couldn't help but almost fall asleep halfway through the teacher talking about random things. Wasn't he supposed to be teaching them something already? This isn't grade school.

By the time lunch time came around, she was done with her classes for the day. It was time for her to start her new internship at the radio station.

She walked in and was directed to the part of the building she was supposed to be working at. The place looked dead. Like literally dead. Everything was a mess and she couldn't tell what color the walls were because there was so much dust on them. She looked around for someone in charge, but all she could hear was a radio station blaring out of a booth in the back of the room.

When she glanced over towards the windows to the booth, she saw a guy leaning back in his chair stretching his arms. She couldn't help but stare at the muscles in his arm flex a bit. She slowly got herself together and started walking over towards the booth. By the time she made it to the door, it looked like the booth was empty. She almost jumped when the guy swung the door open and grabbed a box of CDs and walked past her.

"Have you been standing there long?" he asked with his British accent. He had the prettiest eyes she thought.

"No. I wasn't just standing here."

"Uh-huh. Sure you weren't." he told her with a wink.

She decided to be confident and fight back.

"Oh so somebody is a player. How many girls have you gotten with that wink and British accent?"

"Quite a few actually. It also helps that I have my own station here and a pretty hot bod."

"Oh do you now. It's not very noticeable." Beca said with a smirk on her face.

"You're one feisty little freshman. I never did get your name."

"It's Beca."

"Why not Becky?"

"Why do you need to kno—know everything?" She said with a stutter. Realization hit her. This guy is just like Scottie. It's like her freshman year at high school all over again. This guy is hitting on her and trying to push her past her normal comfort zone.

"You alright there?"

"Umm sure. Anyways I never did get your name. It's kind of important since you're my boss."

"I'm Luke. As you can see I run the campus radio station. I also work at the clubs around town when I'm not scheduled here."

"That's nice." She was starting to put her walls back up. Every memory with Scottie was running through her head. The whole reason she came to this stupid college was to get away from any memory of him or the chance of running into him in LA. She didn't really want any more small talk with Luke. She just wanted to start.

"So do I just stack them on any shelf?"

"Ummm yeah. And you will have another guy helping you. He called saying he couldn't make it today."

"Okay. Sounds good. Thanks, Luke."

Luke was kind of confused, but went back to his booth.

Beca spent the next 4 hours stacking CDs before she was finished.

By the time she got to her dorm she was too wiped out to get any homework done, so she just knocked out.

That night she dreamt about Scottie. They were adults. He was in a business suit and she was still in jeans and a shirt, but she looked more mature. She wasn't wearing so much makeup and she looked like she took care of herself better.

She dreamt about what everybody expected to happen between her and Scottie, but then her dream took a turn and she woke up screaming and hyperventilating.

"Beca? Are you okay?" Casey asked her drearily.

"Yeah. Sorry I woke you up." She sighed as Casey went back to sleep.

Beca decided she wouldn't be able to sleep for the rest of the night, so she was going to go for a walk around the campus. She got dressed in some jeans and a warm jacket and started lingering around the campus.

She didn't expect anyone to be out at this time on a Tuesday night, so she was surprised when this guy walking around to. Once she got closer to him he looked up at her. He looked familiar, but she couldn't put a name to him, so she just kept walking and ignored the guy staring at her.

She found a coffee shop open all night on campus. She went in and got some coffee and sat down. They had a nice collection of books, so she picked a random book off of the shelf and started reading it in silence.

"Hey. Don't I know you?" She heard someone call out. She put down her book to see who it was.

It was the guy she saw on her way over here.

"Umm. No. I don't think so."

"Wait a minute. I sang to you."

"What?" She was completely bewildered.

"Yeah. I was in the backseat playing the most epic air guitar solo to Carry On My Wayward Son and you were just staring at me while unpacking your bags from a taxi. Wait is your dad a taxi driver?"

This guy was kind of freaking her out. He was kind of crazy and nerdy.

"No." She said while she rolled her eyes and continued sipping her coffee and reading her book.

"To Kill A Mockingbird. Good Choice." The mystery guy said as he pulled up a chair to Beca's table.

"So what's your story, Mystery Girl? Are you one of those girls who acts all badass and tough, but is really just a bitch who can't make any friends so she feels sorry for herself and expects everyone to do the same?"

Beca scoffed and slammed her book on the table.

"What makes you think you have the right to insult me? You don't even know me."

"I know that you're stressed out for some reason. Why would you be up at this time at night roaming around the campus all by yourself if you weren't? You really shouldn't do that by the way. There are some crazy people out there who would try something on an innocent girl who is all by herself at 3 in the morning just lurking around campus."

"I'm not stressed. I have nothing to stress about. And what about you? Why are you walking around right now stalking the only 'innocent girl' you see? Maybe you're the psycho searching for your prey. The real question is how do I know you aren't going to follow me out of here and try to rape me or kill me?" Beca asked trying to keep a serious face, but a smirk came out when she saw this nerd look fascinated with her boldness.

"First of all I would never harm a female. Second, can't a guy just be homesick? I couldn't sleep. And if I really was a psycho killer, I would totally choose you to be my prey." He said with a smirk.

"Well I would wish you luck. I'm definitely a fighter."

"I think I could take you. I mean you're so tiny compared to me. Plus look at the guns!" he said while flexing his arms muscles.

She couldn't help but chuckle. And then he joined her.

Once they calmed down he just stared at her while she was looking down at her phone.

He extended his hand "I'm Jesse." She looked up and rolled her eyes.

"What are we 40?" He frowned and brought his arm back.

Beca got up and sipped her last gulp of coffee before throwing the cup away.

Jesse was watching her as she was about to leave.

"I'm Beca."

"It's nice to meet you, Beca." He said as he bowed

She rolled her eyes and started heading back towards her dorm.

_**Alright so…I didn't really plan on them meeting in this chapter. I didn't really plan on them meeting in a coffee shop either. Anyways….it was different from the movie. So let me know what you think in the review box below! Or not. I'm not the boss of you. Haha. Anyways…..Hope you liked it. **____** - Castaway Girl (or Jess)**_


	3. Boundaries,Movies,and A Capella! Oh My!

_**Hello everybody! How are all of my lovely readers/followers? I hope you are all doing well! I'm glad to see some new followers for this story! WELCOME! **____** I'm also glad I got my first review! So thank you Cowboy'sMontana for the review! I realized that these first two chapters are probably really confusing and really boring for you guys since you don't know what I am planning in my head for this story! So please bear with me and this story! **____** And please review more letting me know if you have any suggestions, comments, or concerns! **_

_**Anyways….on with chapter 3!**_

It was Beca's third day at Barden. She had a good start this morning, but she got caught up in mixing one of her mixes during lunch which caused her to run a bit behind for the rest of the day.

Her teachers all scolded her when she walked in late for their lectures, but she didn't really care. However the biggest lecture was still to come.

She started running towards the radio station hoping she would arrive just on time, but as soon as she walked in Luke was just standing there.

"Oh how nice of you to come to your shift today Beca." He said with sarcasm.

"I'm sorry! I got caught up with all of my afternoon classes. Have been running late all day." Beca said hoping this conversation would be over.

"There are tons of freshman who would LOVE to take over your job. If it happens again, you're out. Got it?" Beca had to stop herself from laughing in his face. He sounded like her father, not that she ever talked to him long enough to give her a full lecture.

"Yes sir" Beca simply stated as Luke walked back to his booth.

"Well that was fun to watch!" Somebody said making Beca jump a bit.

"Jesse? What the hell are you doing here?"

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm working obviously!" He said while winking at me and stacking some more CDs.

"YOU'RE my co-worker?"

"Obviously. Jeez what's wrong with you? Did you lose it or something? Maybe you should stop walking around campus at 2 o clock in the morning instead of getting sleep."

"At least I wasn't stalking a poor innocent girl while crying about being homesick."

"You're telling me you've NEVER been homesick? You've never missed your parents or your favorite teddy bear?" Jesse asked Beca.

"I've been sick of home, but never homesick. My parents divorced when I was a kid. My dad left and my mom didn't really care about what I did or how I felt. And I hated toys. ESPECIALLY teddy bears." Beca said smirking at the last part.

"hmph. That's what's wrong with you." Jesse said frozen holding a random cd case.

Beca looked at him curiously. Was he referring to her screwed up parents?

"I meant the teddy bear. Wait, so you didn't like toys, like ever."

"Nope." She said popping the 'p'.

"What, do you not like movies either? Hahaha" He said somewhat sarcastically. He stopped laughing when she just smirked at him and rolled her eyes.

"You don't like movies. Like at all? What the hell is wrong with you? Not liking movies is like not liking puppies" he said with a bewildered look on his face.

"They're fine. I just get bored and never make it to the end." She said while stacking some more CDs.

"The endings are the best part." Clearly Jesse was not amused, but Beca was.

"They're predictable. Like the guy gets the girl and that kids sees dead people and Darth Vader is Luke's father."

Jesse rolled his eyes at Beca. "Oh, right. So you just happened to guess the biggest cinematic reveal in history?"

Beca kind of giggled. Well for her it was a giggle.

"Vader in German means father. His name is literally Darth Father." Jesse just looked away after she said that and stopped stacking CDs once again to gather his thoughts.

"huh. So you know German. Well now I know why you don't like fun things. You know….you need a movie education. A moviecation. And I'm going to give it to you. Although I'm trying out for the Treblemakers, so when I get in I won't have as much free time. You know in between rehearsals, performances, and parties with babes." Jesse said smirking.

It was no secret that he liked Beca. She could tell by the way he flirted that he was attracted to her. And he wasn't so bad himself, but she wasn't ready for a relationship now. She honestly didn't know if she ever would be.

Her thoughts were interrupted when Luke came out of his booth.

"Oh I see you guys have met and become friends fairly quickly." Luke said while staring at them.

Beca then realized how close she was to Jesse and how their positions looked at that moment.

Jesse was standing right behind her stacking CDs on the highest shelf since Beca couldn't reach that high, while she was bent over a little bit stacking some of the vinyl records on the lower shelves.

"Make sure that when you tap that, you stay away from the desk." Luke said to Jesse as he was walking out of the station.

Beca rolled her eyes and Jesse just chuckled softly as he went to get a new box of CDs.

Beca and Jesse stayed for the next few hours stacking CDs. They conversed every once in a while, but stayed quiet for the most part.

Luke came in and said that they were free to go.

Jesse and Beca went to go get their stuff when Luke came over to talk to Beca not caring about Jesse being there.

"So Becky…let me take you out to some of the clubs I DJ at. Didn't you say you made mixes of your own?"

Beca was about to correct him when Jesse dropped in.

"Hey! I thought your name was Beca…like a bird….BECAW!"

"Oh… you're still here mate?"Luke asked clearly annoyed with Jesse interrupting.

"Yep. I wouldn't leave Beca here by herself. She has a long ways to walk back to her dorm."

"hmph. Very well then. Goodnight Beca." Luke said while kissing her hand as if she were royalty.

This simple gesture made her jump. Scottie used to do that all the time.

_Flashaback_

"_Hey Bec! How is my gorgeous girl today? Did that ear spike kill anybody yet?" Scottie said while grabbing her hand and giving it a peck._

"_Haha Scottie. And don't call me gorgeous."_

"_Why not? Afraid somebody might hear me? Who are you crushing on?" he said while tickling her side and then wrapping his arm around her waist as they walked through the halls to lunch.  
"I'm not crushing on anybody. I just don't want anybody to think that we're dating, because we're not. I could NEVER date you. You're too….preppy."_

"_And you're too bitchy. They say opposites attract. Besides, you're not my type. You're too dark and mysterious. However I do love you and you are my best friend. You're lucky I look past your ear spikes and dark clothes and makeup. _

"Hey Beca? Are you okay?" Jesse asked her. She didn't mean to snap at him, but she couldn't help it.

"Look I don't need you watching my every move and trying to protect me. I can take care of myself." She said annoyed with him as they walked out of the radio station.

He stopped for a second and looked at her with disbelief.

"Sorry I was looking after my friend. No need to yell at me. If it weren't for me, Luke would be feeling you up right now."

"Maybe I wanted him to. Did you ever think of that?" she said back at him.

Jesse caught up to her and walked beside her.

"As somebody who cares for you, I would never let that happen. You're too good for him, Beca."

"How is it possible for you to care about me? You barely know me. And that's not really your call, Jesse."

This made Jesse sigh out in frustration and grab her arm to stop her from walking any farther.

"Why can't you just accept the fact that somebody could see past your walls and see you for who you really and like that? You think Luke gives a damn about you? All he cares about is the pleasure you could bring him for 5 minutes. Beca, look at me."

This caused Beca to look at him and calm down.

"Look, I would never hook up with Luke. Sure, he's attractive, but he reminds me too much of an old….friend of mine. I came to Barden to get away from my past. You don't have to worry about me and Luke. Just don't get in the middle of my problems. It's not your job."

He sighed, but shook his head.

"Alright, fine. But I swear if Luke does anything-"

"Then it'll be my problem, not yours."

And she pulled on Jesse's hand for them to start walking again. She was surprised that she could feel a rush as soon as their skin met, but she just shook it off.

"So are you doing anything tonight?" Jesse asked her as they got closer to her dorm.

"ummm no. Why?"

"I was serious about giving you a moviecation." He said with a smirk.

"There's no way I can get out of it?" Beca said while looking at him with her big pleading grey eyes.

"Nope." He said and pulled her towards his dorm.

When they arrived he introduced her to his roommate, Benji.

"It's nice to meet you, Benji." Beca said with a smile and handshake.

"So you'll be all nice to him and shake his hand, but I get the rude side of Beca? How unfair!"

"Shutup, Nerd." She told him as he sat on his bed and patted the spot next him.

As he pulled out his laptop, he picked a few movies and let Beca pick.

"Ummm I don't know. I'm not the movie expert. You are."

"Breakfast Club it is then!"

Right when Jesse put the movie in, Benji interrupted.

"I'm going to go practice for my audition. See you later Jesse. Nice to meet you Beca!"

"Audition?"

"He's trying out for the Treblemakers too."

"oh the organized group singing? That's…so nerdy. You'll both fit right in!"

"You're just jealous because I can sing!" Jesse said as he was setting up the movie still.

"How do I know if you can really sing? You could be the worst singer for all I know!"

"Oh really?"

"yep."

Jesse then started singing Titanium.

"You know David Guetta?" Beca asked shocked that he knew something cool for once.

"Do I live under a rock? Of course I do!"

"Sorry. Didn't take you for the 'hip' type." Beca said while exaggerating the word hip.

"Yeah yeah. What about you? Do you sing? Or is music too dorky too?"

"I guess I can sing. I mainly create mixes."

"Really? That's awesome."

"I want to produce music. That's what I originally planned to do after high school. I was going to move to LA and produce music, but some things got in the way of that." Beca said trying to not to get lost in thought again and worry Jesse. She didn't feel like opening up about her past. She wanted to forget everything so she could move on, but it just wouldn't happen fast enough.

"Well then, it looks like we'll be neighbors, if that's still your plan. To move to LA I mean. I want to create movie scores. You know make people cry and stuff by the time the credits roll."

"That is fascinating." She said somewhat sarcastically. To be honest she thought it was really cool that he wanted to create music too. Creating scores was just like Jesse.

She can't believe she just met this guy and she already knows a lot about him. It's only been two days for crying out loud.

"So ready for a life-changing event? By the time you watch this whole movie, I want to see tears."

"Oh, I'm sure that will happen."

Half way through the movie Beca couldn't help but yawn and get distracted. Jesse just kept shushing her when she would make too much noise.

She rolled her eyes and got off of the bed. She had to pee and the restrooms were down the hall for Jesse's dorm.

"Where are you going?" Jesse asked as he paused the movie.

"I have to pee. Jeez. I promise I'll be right back. Or maybe not. I'm still trying to decide whether I should run for it or come back and record you watch this movie so I can show it to everybody on campus and let them know how nerdy you are." Beca said with a smirk. Jesse just rolled his eyes.

"Hurry up."

"Yes, sir." She said while saluting him and walking out of his dorm towards the rest room.

When she walked out she was softly singing Titanium to herself.

"YOU CAN SING!"

She jumped when she saw Jesse leaning against the wall right beside her.

"Jesus. Jesse. You scared the shit out of me! What the hell is wrong with you? I thought you were in your room."

"Well you were taking too long and I didn't want you to miss the ending. Don't try to change the subject. I thought you told me you couldn't sing."

"I said I could kind of sing."

"You can more than kind of sing. You're AMAZING!"

"Jeez keep it down. Nobody else needs to know."

"You need to try out with me. Come on any of the groups would have to choose you. I mean imagine it. I would be one of those a-capella boys and you would be one of those a-capella girls and we would have aca-children. It's inevitable."

Beca just stared at him with a dirty look on her face.

"First of all, we will NEVER have children together. OR be in a relationship. Second of all, no! I'm not going to try out for nerd A capella singing clubs or whatever. No."

"Oh, I'll get you to audition. I have a month to convince you."

"Good luck."

**Okay then. I feel like I just kept writing just to write. So I apologize. Jesse was more involved in this chapter! That's a good thing, right? :D I'm changing the original movie plot around a little bit and adding my own parts. Eventually I will run out of scenes from the moive and will have to completely come up with my own ideas, but until then…. **

**REVIEW PLEASE! – Castaway Girl(;**


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